How to Compliment a Beautiful Mature Woman Without Getting Under Her Skin

The situation can turn real ugly real fast if you say the wrong thing.

Tonya S. Ware
5 min readFeb 5, 2021


When women put forth the effort to look their best, it ought to be a crime if nobody notices. But complimenting a beautiful mature woman the wrong way can quickly turn into a serious offense.

If out-of-the-blue you tell her she’s beautiful, she probably won’t like it. She might think you’re shallow or that you’re poking fun at her — even if she spent three hours at the beauty salon.

It takes finesse and know-how to give welcomed compliments. Without them, your praise could backfire and you find yourself wondering, “What just happened?”

Let me let you in on a secret that everybody deserves to know: as women age, it gets harder for some of them to believe they are beautiful.

Why it’s hard to fall for compliments about appearance

As you age, you see your body changing. The older you get, the faster the changes seem to come. Sometimes they happen overnight. For example, you might wake up and notice hair that fell out of your eyebrows is now growing on your chin. The realization of these changes can tear at a woman’s self-esteem. Although she knows she needs to deal with maturing, it takes a while to process it all.

Then, some well-meaning person comes along and tells her that she’s beautiful. What you meant as a compliment can feel like an insult to her. It leads to hurt feelings or anger because beauty is not what she sees anymore.

It’s all in how you see it

I seldom notice women. I prefer looking at men. Yet, while trying to squeeze my way through a crowded supermarket, an exceptionally attractive woman caught my attention. She was stunning, what most people would call drop-dead-gorgeous. On top of that, she moved with royal elegance.

Dressed in the finest attire from her eyeglasses to her shoes, she could’ve walked off the set of a back-in-the-day television series like Dallas or Dynasty. Trying not to stare, I couldn’t help but smile. I liked her style. Is she a celebrity? Should I recognize her? I…



Tonya S. Ware

Live healthy, age well, laugh, and have fun. Let’s make it happen.